Thursday, 31 March 2011

The Independence Paradox

It must be difficult being a man today; a straight man anyway... Not that I would know anything about it. The expectations of society on the oh so needed martian species are demanding, to say the very least. He  is expected to do more than just provide, protect, to be as romantic,if not more, as any Nicolas or Alejandro Kenyan women watch on TV... Blah! Blah! Blah! 

The only problem with these expectations is that the woman today is either at per with the man in her life or way ahead. You see girls grow up being indoctrinated with sayings such as what a man can do, a girl can do better! Hence the dilemma in today's society. Women are practically taking good care of themselves; at least the so called "independent woman" is. 

Whilst these women exhumes independence that perhaps only Obama has :), turns more heads than her mother has in her lifetime, she remains a woman at the end of the day... Therefore, she is independent insofar as material things are concerned; Emotionally??? That's a new topic all together. This independent woman may proclaim that she doesn't need a man for anything. In fact many, myself included, have at one point or another shouted that statement off the top of our lungs (or told it to a girlfriend), whether after a relationship gone bad, a random girls night out (read venting session on the man in or who have been in our lives; fathers, brothers, random flings, boyfriends e.t.c.), or in our happy-alcohol-induced-state of minds.Yet, this is the same independent woman who glows a little bit more when flirting with a man whom she likes (and he pretends to like her), this is the woman who when going out to meet her girls, will probably wear something nice so that her girls can go uuuuuuu lala lala about her look; and when going out on a date will look extra nice to impress the man... Independence is as vague a concept as the concept of Self-Actualization by Abraham Maslow... It cannot be achieved entirely 100%. Women have advanced past needing men for material things and men seem to have missed out on the memo. They are at a point where the man in her life needs to give her "the alleged rubbish" that Alejandro, Nicolas or whoever in those Mexican soaps gives to those Mexican women.

So for women, who are brave enough to get married, the most important thing for them during their vows is: "TO LOVE AND TO HOLD, FROM THIS DAY FORWARD TILL DEATH DO US PART". For women who are unmarried but committed, its the sweet-nothings (read common compliments showered to women by men) that matter to them; with the hopeful yet doubtful expectation of marriage or a wedding.

Its hard being a man today because being a man today means that you work extra hard to give your lady more than material things... Heck, if you meet and satisfy her emotional needs and your broke and she is not, there is a higher probability of her staying with you than the alternative martian who consistently takes her out on dinner dates and then tells her at the end of the month she needs to loose some weight because she's become fat! 

The woman today is quite an enigma; but it is never really that hard to unravel her. Its as simple as be better than she, financially, and give her some T.L.C.

Diclaimer: I have ABSOLUTELY NO STOMACH for Mexican soaps. :)