Friday 12 December 2014

Letter to my younger self by Guest Blogger

Ola!!! Happy end of year folks :)  It's been a fantastic year, hasn't it?

So, I have this loyal follower who, I suppose was too troubled by the fact that I have posted something all year, and therefore wrote this piece and asked me to share it on her behalf. I think she is a great soul and I am only to happy to share her piece with you - mostly because it's something I think most of us should pen down at one point in our lives.

To today's guest blogger: Thank you for bringing life (and your wisdom) to the blog. Much appreciated

Enjoy it folks!!! 


"The thing about life is you really never know how it’s going to unfold. It’s like walking on a tight rope blindfolded. There could be moments when your balance is immaculate and just when you think you have a handle on things, suddenly you are toppling almost crashing down…Oh little princess you will have quite a ride, there are so many things I wish I could protect you from…fears of your own inadequacies real or imagined, hurt from people who whispered promises of how they would never hurt you, the thin line between love and hate, grief, regret but all these things add onto the wholesomeness of the life that you will live. I also wish I could show you so many amazing things about yourself, your kind heart, passion that could cause a movement, a rare kind of thoughtfulness, loyalty that fiercely protects those you love…I wish you knew just how special you are. You are far from ordinary and you are not normal.
Your childhood is going to be a strange one there will be moments of happiness but there is an experience that will change you….you will lose someone who you dearly love and you will never recover from it, not fully anyway. However when you let go and you will let go of the sadness, bitterness and questions, you will be thankful that you have a tiny memory of what it means to have a great man in your life. Remember how he used to love taking photos of you? Remember how he used to give you little shiny coins for you to save? Remember how you both used to enjoy road trips? In those moments you spend together you will learn kindness, giving without expecting anything in return…Little angel there will be a void in your life that can’t be filled, many men will try none will come close. You will yearn for his direction, his wisdom, his embrace, deep conversations and so many times you will need a man to talk to but in quiet reflections you will discover you are so much like him resolute, always in pursuit of happiness, independent, adventurous, passionate, sarcastic, loyal….Oh my darling you will miss him terribly and sometimes it will hurt almost physically….but you will remember to smile again so wipe away that tear child.

Your teenage years will be filled with mischief….always getting into trouble maybe that’s because you have a rebellious streak but it’s born out of curiosity and remember what I told you before you are not ordinary. Society will try and box you into this normal space you won’t fit, try all you want sweetheart but it won’t work, the earlier you understand this the easier your life will be. Boys…It’s funny how you will relate with boys through the course of your life, you will go through I don’t give a crap phase, I’m so swooned phase, all I want is to be friends, why are all the good guys taken, why can’t I love him as much as he loves me, why can’t he love me as much as I love him….You will go through all these phases but even in the highs and lows and in moments where you feel broken and everything around you is crushing you will still believe in love and pray it finds you because you will get tired of searching for it….Anyway kiddo thing is you won’t have it together when it comes to boys not for a while. It will take several heartbreaks, a trash load of mistakes, jokers, good guys, funny guys, annoying guys, almost perfect guys….for you to realize that you can’t be happy with an ordinary guy because remember what I keep telling you, you are not ordinary and that’s not a short term view it’s the long term view of who you are! Be not yoked with ordinary my child….. J

Then you will turn into a beautiful smart young woman….a young woman who enjoys the taste of fine wine, the luxury of dining and laughing with friends, the occasional flirting with those who make your heart stir if only for a little while, more importantly a woman who believes that her Lord brought her to this earth for a reason, a purpose which you will spend years chasing after, questioning what I’m I here for? Why have I been so richly blessed? What does the Lord require of me…You will question God’s plan for your life, always looking to know the answer but child faith and trust will be your biggest lessons….Faith, substance of things not seen. You will fight with God endlessly and you will crawl back to Him because you will also understand that His grace is sufficient for you because His power is made perfect in weakness....Grace: Divine resources necessary to bear the weight of your situation....How I wish I could protect you from lonesomeness, it’s funny how you will ever be surrounded with many friends but where the truth lies in your soul, you will know that you are restless, present physically but absent….Don’t give in to too much solitude, especially the kind that makes you feel like you can’t let people in, it will cause you unimaginable pain. You will also struggle with forgiveness but darling sometimes you need to just let it go… sometimes you will realize you are the cause of your own struggles and you will need to search your heart to truly understand those things that you struggle with.

Travel will be your greatest joy…You will fall in love with the thrill of flying and visiting new places. A little part of you will crave to wander out in the mountains, on the beach side; in the country side, discover new cities, experience different cultures…You will travel to run away from loneliness as well as commitment and companionship, you will travel to find yourself and lose yourself all in the same intensity, to meet new friends and catch up with old ones, to look for answers….Many times you will go out of your comfort zone to experience nature because it’s where your soul finds peace. You will enjoy the company of a good book and quiet reflections on a plane, a train, a bus…..Oh my child the beauty of this world will engulf you, haunt you and make you question your ability to happily settle in any one place.

You will have dreams so big that you will want to hand them back to the porter’s hands, you will also have distaste for mediocrity and you will push yourself sometimes a bit too much to excel. You will realize that it’s ok to admit that you are defeated you need not be ever so strong…..and one day if the Lord blesses you, you shall find a man who is extra ordinary, intrigues every fiber in you, who loves adventure, who enjoys silent companionship, a good meal and a perfect glass of wine, one who reads and appreciates music, the kind who will love your family and make you feel like a part of his and when you start a family of your own he will remember that his allegiance is to you above all else, the one who will protect you, challenge you, cherish you, more importantly who loves God deeply and allows you to be yourself every version that is and is yet to come. Hopefully one day you will both be blessed and you will look into your daughter’s eyes and tell her that she is the most perfect thing in this world and you will hold your son’s hand and tell him that he is worth more than anything in the world….that you are glad you chose to have them at that perfect time in your life and you never thought you could ever love another human being as much as you love them. You will teach them how to be graceful and fierce, how to walk with their heads up, respect and honour, to take time to look around to see the beauty in the world but also allow themselves to be humbled and inspired by the people God has placed along their way, to smile often and laugh until tears roll down their cheeks, never to be afraid to follow their passion and to be true to themselves but more importantly to be true to their maker. They will show you that you are so much more than what you ever thought; truly multidimensional, rare, sophisticated and only then will you begin to understand what I have been telling you all along that you are nothing close to ordinary."

Signed,
Reflective older you